Following You

Hello friends!  My name is Lindsay Crouse, I am 18 years old, and I live Iowa.  In a mere 22 days, I will be boarding a plane for my first mission trip overseas with Hosea’s Heart.  When people ask me what my plans are for the summer and I mention Swaziland, it still just seems like one massive joke.  I still cannot completely wrap my head around the concept, and I don’t think it will become reality for me until I’m finally boarding the plane.  Besides the constant disbelief of my nearing endeavor, here is my story of how I have wound up preparing to leave for Swaziland, Africa. J

On December 31, of 2011, I got on a bus headed for Atlanta, Georgia alongside a large group of people headed to a conference known as Passion 2012.  Passion lasted for about 5 days, and was without a doubt one of the best experiences of my life.  At Passion, there were world known inspirational speakers such as Francis Chan, and John Piper.  On top of that, there were a never-ending stream of incredibly amazing Christian worship leaders such as Chris Tomlin, and David Crowder Band.  The main concept of the entire week was to not only build your relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, but the planners, speakers, and bands did a phenomenal job of further expanding the audiences’ understanding of the ongoing battle of slavery, and sex trafficking around the world today.  They showed us videos of personal interviews with victims of the slave industry.  Every new clip not only caused me to experience nausea and disgust, but a sense of conviction.  Passion thankfully gave us the opportunity to donate to the cause.  As a whole we ended up raising an insane amount of money to various organizations such as IJM, Tiny Hands, and the A21 Project.  Praise Jesus!! This news completely thrilled me, but for some reason I still felt convicted and almost guilty.  One of the last nights of Passion, they showed us one of the most intense videos.  Immediately afterwards a worship leader began to sing a super pumped up joyous song to the Lord.  As I looked around, everyone looked as if they were all just hit by a bus.  I couldn’t stand to sit there and join in on worship as if everything felt ok.  At this point I was incredibly frustrated of why God has allowed all this to happen.  “Jesus.  Those are YOUR CHILDREN and they are in SO MUCH pain!!   What more can we do for these people?  Where do we start?!”  These were some of the thoughts flying through my brain.  Throughout the process I just felt God telling me. ….“Go.”  At this point, I was WAY more than puzzled and frustrated.  Last summer I went to Los Angeles, and my parents had a difficult time even allowing me to go there.  So how on earth would I be capable of saying “Oh hey mom and dad!  I’m female and 18 years old.  This summer I would like to fly to a foreign country and fight against sex trafficking!  Good idea huh?”  …… Yeah….. I thought for sure it would be a simple “ummm no,” from my parents.  So as the music started playing after this clip that lead me to all of these thoughts, I headed for the hallway and just stood there in bewilderment and prayer.  My friend Gabe thankfully came around the corner with open ears willing to listen to what was currently on my heart.  At the end I expressed to him that I will probably just wait until I’m much older to do anything about it.  He said something that really pushed me towards actually considering the possibility of actually doing something about my conviction.  “Lindsay, if God has called you to go, then He will make it happen.  It doesn’t matter what you think your parents will say.  If you are meant to go on a mission trip to fight for this cause, God will open a door.”  Sure enough… he was right J

When I got home from Passion, my best friend Rachael Schaeffer came over and I poured out my whole heart about everything that went on.  I literally got out my notebook and re-preached every messege to her!!  At the end of the conversation about me telling her my desire to go out and do something about it, she mentioned that her sister Beth had an awesome roommate named Mary-Kate who has the same passion and has created an organization called Hosea’s Heart.  Rachael showed me Hosea’s Heart’s facebook page, and from there I got Mary-Kate’s email J  When I sent Mary-Kate an email, I seriously wasn’t expecting a response anytime soon nor a future opportunity with Swaziland.  Just went out on a limb and thought “Oh hey, why not?  If something is meant to happen, it will!  It’s in God’s hands now.”  Before I knew it…. SHE EMAILED ME BACK! I seriously was freaking out.  Mary Kate was totally accepting, and encouraged the idea of me coming along.  Wow, God is SO GOOD.  The crazy part of it all, is that my parents have been, for the most part, pretty chill about me going to Swaziland.  They have doubts here and there, and a lot of adults keep expressing their doubts to my mother of her decision.  But through the power of prayer, God has allowed for this to mission trip to happen. J

At Passion, I had the glorious privilege of rooming with a beautiful woman named Kirsten Scheller-Suitor.  She is SO excellent, and totally radiates God’s love 24/7.  During the conference she had such a difficult time with the videos and the heartbreak of women all over the world.  She also was missing her “ninos” from her previous mission trip in the Philippines.  Kirsten throughout the trip expressed her conviction and desire to go out on another mission trip for this cause.  Immediately when lovely Rachael told me about Hosea’s Heart I texted Kirsten right away and told her about our potential opportunity.  Needless to say, Kirsten is also boarding the plane to head to Swaziland, Africa.  AND after Rachael told me about Hosea’s Heart, she started to feel convicted and now she is going too!!

God has entirely rocked my world, and revealed his ultimate power.  I have learned so far that God doesn’t take “no” or “I’ll do it later” for an answer.  Why should we ever attempt to make our own plans when in the end God has our daily agenda already completed?  I am more than excited for June 26^th to arrive, and to serve alongside the beautiful people of Swaziland, and to no longer sit on the sidelines.  About a month ago I was flipping through my journal, and in September I wrote “Lately I’ve had a huge heart for Africa.”  In September, the thought of going to Africa was such a distant goal/dream.  On January 5^th, I wrote, “I feel compelled to do mission work and help the helpless.  Lead me towards my next step in life.  I will follow you.”  And on January 16, 2012, I wrote, “Please give me a direction.  Tell me if Swaziland is where I need to be.  I love you will all my heart.  I want to always drink from your merciful well.”  WOW.  God is so good.   Now I am actually officially GOING to Swaziland.  Unbelievable.  Prayers are very much needed, because without the love of Christ this mission wouldn’t be possible! J